When healing hurts.

Ask my husband and he will tell you that I am a bit accident prone. It's never anything major but lots, (and lots) of little boo boos all the time. I started out this summer with a bang by braking the big daddy toe of my left foot and ended our summer by putting a rusty nail through my right big daddy toe. Every kitchen counter, door knob, rug, hammer and even stair way is an opportunity in the making for my next wound. That being said I know a bit about healing. It takes a bit of time but it can also hurt. Ask anyone that has had to undergo physical therapy, there is a lot of pain involved in bringing that body part back to it's full use. I feel the same can be true in spiritual healing.
Spiritual healing and growth are what brings me the most joy in ministry. Nothing is more exciting than seeing someone that has struggled with pain and hurt be freed. The same goes for growth.
I cant tell you how many times my daughter has come to me and said "mom, my knees really hurt." or "my elbows are sore." As our bodies grow taller and mature is aches, nags and hurts. Growing pains are a normal way of life but I think we forget that fact as we grow into adulthood. We don't think healing or growth should hurt. we think the very words by definition should make us feel better but the truth is more often then not you can't have spiritual growth or healing without some pain. Often the pain comes in the form of having to admit that  we bear some sinful responsibility in that broken relationship with that parent, spouse or child. It is much easier to remain a victim to that relationship than to truly seek forgiveness for our part in any separation so that true healing can begin. Why? because it causes us pain and discomfort to humble ourselves before God and others.
Sometimes the pain comes in the form of the revelation that the very thing you detest most in others is one of your biggest flaws. That thing that your best friend does niggles at you the very most is in fact the very thing the Holy Spirit has been calling you to see in yourself and cut out. That is a very painful and again, humbling feeling to know we have judged, gossiped and eye rolled others about the very subject that your loved ones would use to define you. People often pay lip service to the topics of healing and growth. I mean have you ever heard anyone say "I really want to stay here in my pain and immaturity." No, you never hear that. What you do hear is a lot of "I really WISH I could move on from such and such that happened 20 years ago." or "I WISH I knew the bible as well as so and so." But our actions speak much louder than our words. We give more time to our pleasures than we go to growth. We wallow in self pity over the pain of the past  and use that as a way to cling to our sinful flaws. I know all this well because I too have done and I'm sure will do these kinds of behaviors again. It's not so much that we "do" this but how we react to it when it's pointed out to us. King David shows us a great way to get past this kind of cycle in the Psalms. He often starts his prayers with "search me o Lord, show me who I really am. Lay bear before me the sin that causes you and I both pain." What if we all started to pray that way? What if we all started to give grace to others in their flaws because we know the Lord is working out the same thing in us? What if we all learned how to really heal for good? What would we look like if we gave up our "crutches" that keep us from true spiritual healing and growth? I know for a fact that is what I want. there is a line from a popular Christian song that has been haunting my thoughts so much as of late that it has become my prayer. it goes "I don't want a flame I want a fire." I want to be made whole. I want to be a mature Christian. Even if it hurts.